Ugly Puffer Fish » Creative

Why do the talent always get the girls?

Magiccrab — Wed, 19 May 2010 08:30:38 +0000

It seems that no matter how inappropriate the action, the actor runs away with the makeup girl. (Filmed for Cultflicks.net’s Forbidden Zone intro remake.)

Kyoto Wars Returns

Magiccrab — Tue, 09 Feb 2010 19:14:38 +0000

Found a old blast from the past, a birthday present I made for Casey.

Enjoy: http://uglypufferfish.com/kyotowars/

Don’t pay too much attention to the Lush medley… rather, observe the amazing design features of the site.

Logo Design

Magiccrab — Fri, 22 Jan 2010 16:17:39 +0000

This is something an actual, real life, semi-human being asked of one of my colleagues when designing a logo for their website:

Logo: need a stable, recognizable image the elders will find comforting and the younger will find secure; was thinking of using a sillouette of a victorian era nurse as part of the logo, But to consider on individual and selected pages–to include a woman listening into a seashell for a page that talks about how we listen to them –they are our eyes and ears. I also like using the C three times like waves as the logo. Comforting pictures of elders with their pet and in their home–maybe I could get someone to hold snickers (her fucking dog)

Colors: studies are showing that red and yellow are more visible to the older eye than blues and greens. Maybe a primary combo of red, yellow and black or green would be good?

It always amazes me how few webmasters go crazy and end up shooting up design conferences.

More Demotivators

Magiccrab — Tue, 03 Nov 2009 04:00:43 +0000

Halloween Beard Costume Ideas

Magiccrab — Fri, 30 Oct 2009 05:37:56 +0000

So Halloween is here again, and once again, it makes life a little difficult having facial hair. Now other than the usual lame Jesus, Osama Bin Laden, ZZ Top or possibly Evil Spock (totally not lame). So I did some digging into what is out there for bearded men looking for Halloween ideas for the modern nerd – I figured cartoon characters, video game folk, etc etc. Almost nothing… other than some guy with a blog complaining that he didn’t have any ideas. Anyway, I put together this list as a start… feel free to add to it if you find this site… which you won’t.

The GG Allin Puppet Show

Magiccrab — Tue, 04 Aug 2009 23:42:35 +0000

Shot a while ago on the old green screen, but recently rediscovered.

I got a D40

Magiccrab — Tue, 14 Jul 2009 21:04:02 +0000

Ok, not the greatest of the DSLRs… in fact I think it is the cheapest that Nikon offers, but these are unedited and look pretty good to me. I found this guy sitting outside of my house yesterday. If you know my, you can imagine this was a difficult experience.

Little Staring Frog

Terrifying Monster

Frist New Lush For Life post in almost two years

Magiccrab — Sun, 07 Jun 2009 18:30:08 +0000

Yes, that’s right folk, I posted a new story on lushforlife.com. Now you may ask yourselves, “What the hell does anyone care about a defunct comedy newspaper?” and the answer is “no one really” but I had a satirical news piece that was lying around with nothing to do. You see some of the boys here in Tampa (with previous L4L experience) were invited to try and spice up Toms Hardware Guide a bit by adding some comedic fair. However, yours truely’s second piece for the online giant was deemed too racy/racist for the clean-cut corporate image of the online magazine. Any way, if you’re interested in reading it, it’s here (RIM to Release Crackberry Standard and Pro), or if you want to read what we’re doing on Tom’s, we’ve done these so far. Enjoy!

Sandbox Astronomy

Magiccrab — Mon, 11 May 2009 01:50:23 +0000

So my brother has a band, and lives in Pittsburgh, so it’s was a little difficult to get out to see the show. However, they were gracious enough to film some of the songs. Not a whole lot of people around, but for a first show, I think they did pretty freaking well. They’re somewhere around the eels, New Pornographers and such indie rock with a bit of talent fare.

http://www.youtube.com/sandboxastronomy

They also have a nice little website hosted by yours truely here.

Enjoy…

Sunscreen Song Parody

Magiccrab — Thu, 27 Nov 2008 16:52:06 +0000

Ok well I found this thanks to Myke sending me a link on web archive to my old site. It’s a parody of the Sunscreen song… why I wrote this I do not know. Here’s the original if you’ve forgotten.
I think I wrote this around the Millennium… and yes, I’ve always been a geek.

If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be it. The long-term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists, whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience. I will dispense this advice now.

Enjoy the power and beauty of a Mac. Oh, never mind. You will not understand the power and beauty of a Mac until they’ve faded. But trust me in 20 years, you’ll look back at photos of them and recall in a way you can’t grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous they really looked. Your bandwidth is not as fat as you imagine.

Don’t worry about the future. Or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve a programming problem by smoking a joint. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind, the kind that blindside you at 4 p.m. on some idle Tuesday.

Look at one website everyday that scares you.

Ping.

Don’t be reckless with other people’s hard drives. Don’t put up with people who are reckless with yours.

Format.

Don’t waste your time on AOL. It was a stupid idea, and it’s never going to work in the long run. Its death will be long and, in the end, it’s only going to be cable.

Remember compliments you receive. Forget the insults. If you can’t, I have some good DOSS software you can use.

Keep your old love emails. Hack in and destroy your old bank statements.

Scan.

Don’t feel guilty if you don’t how to program. The most interesting people I know have never even seen a computer and probably never will. Most of these people though live in special homes and wear hug me jackets.

Get plenty of calcium. Be kind to your figures. You’ll miss them when you can’t type.

Maybe you’ll code, maybe you won’t. Maybe you’ll have a dotcom upstart, maybe you won’t. Maybe you’ll go public and make $100 million in four months, maybe you’ll go to jail for fraud when you 22. Whatever you do, don’t congratulate yourself too much; get others to do it for you. Your choices are Linux. So should everybody else’s be too.

Enjoy your Palm Pilot. Wear it on your belt. Don’t be afraid to use Palm OS. A PDA is the greatest instrument you’ll ever own.

Dance, even if you have nowhere to do it but your own living room with you PS and Dance-Dance Revolution

Do not read Photoshop magazines they will only make you feel stupid.

Get to know your parents. You never know what they’ll be good for later. Be nice to your siblings. They might start up a company that needs to pay an IT person disgusting amounts of money.

Understand that friends come and go, but with a precious few you should web conference with. Email them to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle, because the older you get, the more you need the people who knew you when you were young.

Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard. Live in Northern California once, but leave before you make any software.

Surf.

Accept certain inalienable truths: Memory prices will drop. Microsoft will fuck everyone. You, too, will get old. And when you do, you’ll get pumped full of shark hormones and have your brain transplanted into a cloned body.

Keep an old Dos machine.

Don’t expect anyone to support you. Maybe you have a venture capitalist. Maybe you’ll have a wealthy spouse. But you never know if they’ll run off together.

Don’t mess too much with your Windows partition, or you’ll have to reinstall the god damn thing every month.

Be careful whose software you buy, but be patient with open source. Software is a form of nostalgia. Dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than its worth.

But trust me on the sunscreen